Meta Stack OverflowQuestion title that doesn't describe the problem
[+150] [44] Adam Davis
[2010-03-12 05:24:22]
[ discussion meta fun ]

Pre Edit 4:

Pointing out that thread's popularity is a direct result of programming community interest in said subject, and that someone likely stands to become rich and/or famous by solving the problem none of the answers, save my own, came even close to resolving.

Long salutation describing my programming experience and implying that I am a programming genius even though I was educated as a philosopher. Ill-fitting analogy explaining that philosophers make better programmers than classically trained programmers.

Meandering post describing a minor issue and suggesting a poor/incomplete solution while also inferring that those who disagree are blatant rep whores.


Major edit that changes the whole point of the question, nullifying any existing answers, and openly marveling at inability of others to understand this trivial but super-important request.

Edit 2:

Response to detracters, repeating what I already said in the comments.

Edit 3:

Reluctant acquiescence to community, asserting that community is still wrong but accepting that it cannot help me any further, and I'm leaving unsatisfied. Pointed comments directed towards specific users or answers publicly belittling them. Thanks to those who obviously understand the issue even though their solutions were grossly inadequate, calling into question their schooling and ancestry.

Complimentary closing,

P.S. Suggestion that people study My favorite Programming Book before answering such advanced questions as these on SO.

(7) preemptive comment asking that people give it serious consideration rather than closing it. - Adam Davis
(1) Trying to get the first Friday post in? - Lance Roberts
(5) Is this the bit where I edit the question title only to find it rolled back 10 minutes later? - Erik
(22) follow up comment pointing out a dupe, then explaining how it's not an exact dupe by splitting hairs. - Adam Davis
(11) What exactly are you asking? - Josh K
(17) Comment about a missing screenshot which may or may not be required to further clarify the point. - random
(5) @random long winded treatise on the usefulness of screenshots and how they would actually cloud the issue further. - Adam Davis
(5) I was going to edit the title to make it unrelated to the problem, but I see you're way ahead of me there. - mmyers
(4) barely contained rage at users who edited the OP. subtle insinuations of deviant misconduct with creatures other than homo sapiens. - Adam Davis
(63) Snarky comment about OP's 37% accept rate. - mmyers
(8) @mmyers brash invitation to respond to all my questions with an answer I can accept while implying that the accept rate metric is ludicrous and should be abolished. - Adam Davis
(2) Comment about how their should be a new close reason or other meta discussion. - Earlz
(2) Abetting @mmyers without substantial contribution. - D_N
(17) @random, @pollyanna, @mmyers - generic comedic response alluding to a recent XKCD strip or /. post - quack quixote
(2) @~quack TLA for audible display of levity - Adam Davis
(19) superfluous request that this be made community wiki, or moved to SuperUser, implication being OP doesn't know how to use the computars. - D_N
(8) Comment that starts out pithy, but then morphs into something which would be better posted as an answer. - ChrisF
(1) comment about how this discussion is meta-meta-meta discussion. - Earlz
(2) Flowing poetic metaphor raising questions regarding the OP's parentage. - Ether
(2) Flagged as "Offensive, Abusive, or Hate Speech" - Robert Cartaino
(48) So can we now flag every question on the site as a duplicate of this one? - mmyers
(4) @mmyers: I'm sorely tempted to do this for every question by a handful of users here on Meta... - Shog9
(5) @Shog9: only a handful? You must have pretty big hands. - perbert
(7) Another superfluous request that this be made community wiki, or moved to SuperUser, implication being OP doesn't know how to use the computars. (With apologies to D_N, but a comment like that has to be repeated. Preferably more than once.) - David Thornley
(6) Comment bemoaning the general decline of SO since the halcyon days of beta. - Michael Petrotta
(1) Um, it doesn't exist here unless there are links to examples? - Rosinante
(3) Comment lamenting the re-appearance of this topic to the front page of this website. Slanderous remark toward editor performing spurious edits to bump topic. Suggestion that moderator lock this topic and foreshadowing of a third party creating a topic to discuss why this topic was locked. - snicker
(3) request this be deleted as it is not programming related - oh wait... off topic ... - IAbstract
(16) Is this homework? We won't do your work for you! - Ether
(1) You should definitely leave this to the experts - IAbstract
(10) Smug observation that this isn't even a problem on Linux/OS X - madlep
Belongs on - Ether
@Ether There is a - Pëkka
(1) @dboar not this question again! - Earlz
@Earlz, sorry, found something that I really liked. ;) - IAbstract
(5) This article just appeared today, which is another brilliant use of this meme. Don't miss the reader comments! - Ether
(2) Snooty language pedantry clarifying the difference between "inferring" and "implying", and misuse thereof by the OP. - bacar
Comment pointing out that this issue was actually fixed in a quietly rolled-out feature change some weeks/months ago and futilely pointing out that the question should now be closed as "too localized." - Pops
@Ether Profuse thanks for relevant link, applause for your memory of this old question and the effort you went to when finding something else related! - Adam Davis
@Pollyanna: superfluous thank you with no additional information! - Ether
(3) @mmyers: Months late reply to an old comment. - Macha
(1) comment smugly suggesting that this actually belongs on a different site. - Robert S Ciaccio
(1) Snarky bounty added to generate additional interest in subject without adding any new real content, and knowing the situation has not changed enough to warrant bumping it. - Adam Davis
(2) This post has more than 20 comments, please investigate -- Community ♦ - Robert Harvey
(2) Smug comment about a mispelling in your post. - Gabe
This is an example of a question whose description doesn't describe the title. - uɐɯsO uɐɥʇɐN
Comment from someone who first arrived at this question after June 9, 2011, wondering why the post begins with a sentence fragment and then just trailing o - Pops
(1) Have you heard of google?… - Marcelo
(3) Should this be "pro.blem" rather than "problem"? - Andrew Grimm
[+69] [2010-03-12 15:45:42] Pavel Shved

A nicely worded, but pretty useless answer, which mainly gets its upvotes due to extensive use of Markdown [1] formatting and by linking a lot of stuff, both related and unrelated [2] to the problem in question.

Useless title to draw more attention

A lot of basic information about the questioner's problem. Mostly, it repeats what everyone who is familiar with the tags of the question already knows, but in more exuberant manner, providing the basic information at least twice. It also contains scarce code inclusions to look programming-related. The post also contains a few formatting tricks, including:

  • Unnumbered lists [3], with item captions in bold. Items of such list should contain a lot of text, so those who reads the question will be sure, that the user is an expert in his area, and has analyzed a lot of alternatives.
  • Numbered lists, which, of course, may be omitted [4], since users do not like numbers
  • Links, both related and unrelated. At least one link to the blog of the user.
  • A piece of code in the language requested by OP, the piece being originally written in other language by a lowly voted answer.

The post has at least two sections to justify the use of big font, which is used just to make the post look bigger.

Another useless title

In the second section of such a post code snippets are posted. The algorithm was not originally written by the author. But he rewrote it in C#, and since most users know C#, it would be easier for them to upvote a post that contains the language they are familiar with.

public class Hello
   public static void Main()
      System.Console.WriteLine("Hello, World!");

Of course, this code, having been written quickly while the post is still under attention, contains a number of issues that were thankfully discussed on SO before. The users links the other stackoverflow question [5], and one more [6], just in case, so that others upvote him for his effort.

And of course, a hesitating expression of hope that this post helps, knowing that what it helps is only his own reputation counter.


(15) +1 for the big titles, the many links, and for correct use of comma in "Hello, World!" - b.roth
(60) acceptance of answer because it's too long to read, but obvious effort indicates that it must be valuable. - Adam Davis
(33) +1 Because I'm too lazy to scroll down any further. - Robert Cartaino
(9) Gratuitous edit of inconsequential grammar or spelling mistake, even though the answer has already been accepted and nobody really cares. - Robert Harvey
(7) Awwww, I care! - mmyers
(2) Daily vote limit reached; come back in 3 hours. - perbert
(17) Keen observation that author is trying to perform a task. Suggestion that author should totally drop that and try a lightweight JavaScript library that emphasizes interaction between JavaScript and HTML. - snicker
(1) @snicker applause to previous speaker. Expression of confidence that there exists a plugin for that framework that will execute the task at hand to the OP's full satisfaction. - Pëkka
(2) @Harvey, mendacious gratitude for useful edits that only make this post closer to community wiki threshold. - Pavel Shved
(1) Completely inappropriate +1 for this blatantly incorrect answer just because it's on the cusp of earning the Populist badge for its OP and I think that's cool. - Pops
[+41] [2010-03-12 13:24:54] balpha

I have same problem any update?

(12) flagged for moderator attention as non-answer - Adam Davis
(8) Indication of intention to ask question on to ask what should be done about all these useless "noise" answers. - HAL 9000
flagged as spam - perbert
(2) spite-flagged @Yacoby's comment for noise - D_N
(17) Expression of also having the exact same problem. Request to E-Mail instructions how to solve problem post haste to Yahoo E-Mail address. Assurance of gratitude. - Pëkka
go ask your question in another thread - IAbstract
Expression of gratitude towards @dboarman and thanks for his time. Cautious inquiry whether the problem has been solved at this time? Polite request to please E-Mail results to the Yahoo E-Mail address provided above. - Pëkka
(2) Should be a comment, not an answer! :) - uɐɯsO uɐɥʇɐN
[+39] [2010-03-13 15:44:06] Michael Stum [ACCEPTED]

Answer that points out that your Architecture is obviously wrong and questioning why on earth you are still using this stupid technology when your problem could be solved by one line of jQuery code.

    aLongList: ofParameters,
    whichAre: notExplained

(7) insincere thanks for example. subtly sarcastic comments that perhaps if one read through the whole existing Q&A thread one might see that this solution has already been suggested and rejected in comments here… and in an answer here… - Adam Davis
recapitulation of prior comment. explanation of realization that your answer is correct, as are the two others, and that the world now looks so much brighter and full of promise now that I understand the beauty of [insert popular framework here]! insistence that I will earn the ways of said framework, and apply it to each and every problem I see in the future, and profuse thanks for finally getting this through my thick skull. - Adam Davis
(6) (Flagged as offensive and downvoted because I hate OPs that accept low-voted answers.) - Gnome
Angry comment aimed at @Gnome reminding him that this site is not his personal playground. Reminder to exercise restraint on his newly gained editing rights until he understands how to edit other people's posts. - Pëkka
(3) Comment made months later pointing out potential reference to popular topical online web-comic: link to said web-comic (profession of love for particular plain text editor) - snicker
(6) Year-later post pointing out that your answer overlooks serious issue A and B, which are comprehensively handled in (this post of my own)[…, which is itself an answer on a year-old question. An obvious and likely successful ploy to get the Necromancer badge. - ErikE
[+28] [2010-03-12 05:28:39] Earlz

Quick yet canned answer developed in my mind from reading the tags and 2 words of the title of your post.


More offtopic and irrelevant vague things in response to @Pollyanna's comment

(4) immediate terse response requesting that poster read the question prior to posting. - Adam Davis
(6) point by point rebuttal of everything in answer ending with, "but yeah, you're basically right." - Adam Davis
(27) +1 without even reading the answer because everyone else seems to be upvoting it. - Erik
(24) Downvoted because I want my answer to win. - b.roth
(2) Expendable comment just to say "me, too" on highest-voted post. - Robert Cartaino
(3) insincere apology that this answer wasn't selected with vague explanation as to why a lessor voted answer was accepted. - Adam Davis
(2) Criticism of @Pollyanna's spelling. - mmyers
(4) Necrocomment asking why you don't just use jQuery as the accepted answer did - jcolebrand
[+28] [2010-03-12 06:31:27] gnostradamus


(7) Declaration of brilliance. - D_N
(4) +1 for being the only user that understands the issue. shares desire that everyone were as intellectually sound as gnovice. - Adam Davis
(13) incredulous comment about how this obvious answer hadn't already been posted, which is really just a thinly veiled chance to gloat. - gnostradamus
+1 for such a short answer! - Pavel Shved
+1 stating that when I say the title head right in to post this same answer. - perbert
-1 snarky comment insisting that this answer should really be a comment. - Sklivvz
(2) Witty comment complaining about how you're able to post such a short answer, while I keep getting the "answer too short" error. - fretje
[+25] [2010-03-12 22:44:32] snicker

Answer Posted After An Answer is Already Accepted With Superfluous Formatting

Introductory statement about familiarity with the problem. Short background on experience in the field of study related to the question.

Anecdotal short story about how post was just noticed today because generic personal life event has prevented poster from participating in discussions! Statement of confidence that others can relate.

Section about how if extenuating circumstances had not interfered, I would have posted almost the exact same answer. Short response stating that the accepted answer [1] is extremely valuable. Multiple praises of accepted answer. Transition to enumerated list of reasons why accepted answer is great:

  • Praise of accepted answer's formatting clearly being emulated in this answer
  • Acknowledgment of skills and knowledge of the author of accepted answer
  • Statement about brevity and conciseness

Long winded response about what accepted answer would look like if extenuating circumstances had not interfered. Subtle yet sharp jabs at author of accepted answer inferring that my answer would have been better


Pre-emptive edit in response to expected comments regarding freehand circles, waffles, or ponies

Image stressing points mentioned above further


(1) Pointing out that you forgot to include waffle-ponies. - D_N
(2) Pointing out that this really belongs on Meta. - Pëkka
@Pekka: Comparison of this post to other similar posts that belong on meta and are not. - snicker
@D_N: Avowal that waffle-ponies do not exist and their inclusion in referenced answer would be inconsequential - snicker
@snicker Statement that only because those posts weren't moved to meta, it doesn't mean they don't belong there. Insinuation that you are trying to keep your meta answer here in order to gain reputation. - Pëkka
(2) @Pekka: statement of disgust at blatant attempts to slander my name with accusations of rep-whoring. Recommendation that you refrain from further comment. Emotionless response devoid of personality insisting that the rest of your day affect your mood favorably - snicker
(1) @snicker announcing that you are wrong and they are yum-yum delicious. - D_N
(2) @snicker Cool diagnosis, outlining how your overly emotional response must be sign of serious issues. Feignedly symphatetic recommendation of getting some help. Subtle insinuation of your desperate need for rep points being an expression of a deeper deficit in your personal life. Confirmation that the rest of my day is indeed affecting my mood very favourably. Sideways mention of being a total success with women. Subtle implication that you are not. Announcement about having a hot date tonight, and therefore inability to spend any more time in this discussion - Pëkka
(2) +1 for freehand circles. - Adam Davis
@Pollyana: Quite nearly a year later! - snicker
[+23] [2010-03-12 05:36:03] D_N

Dismissive reply by megapoint user.

Statement of annoyance about having to explain himself by way of this update. Introduction to some ASCII art that elucidates nothing about the problem but does reveal why you ought to upvote him.

|                ___      _______/|
|           ____/   \    /        |
|          /         \  /         |
|         /           \/          |
|        /              *         |
|   /\  /                         |
|  /  \/                          |
| /    *                          |
|/                                |
my knowledge
* note that downturns and plateaus were result of listening to other people

|                                 |
|                                 |
|                                 |
|                                 |
|                                 |
|                                 |
|  _______________________________|
| / *                             |
|/                                |
your knowledge 
* note that uptick is from one of my previous answers

I downvote dismissive replies. - Erik
deliberate misinterpretation of answer to prove the point. - Adam Davis
Sneer at downvote. - D_N
(1) @Pollyanna adoption of tone that suggests but does not claim insider knowledge about something X that has tangential application to the problem. (Or does one @user when being this snooty? I dunno.) - D_N
@D_N request for proof with subtext that it's BS - Adam Davis
(2) +1 sympathetic upvote with wink - we megapoint users gotta stick together... - Adam Davis
smug silence? (I dunno, my act runs out at this point.) - D_N
(3) Criticize @Pollyana for sympathy upvote. - perbert
Some formulation marginally better than a growl @voyager, pointing to my update. - D_N
(11) Removing downvote to recover my own points, even though I allude its because you made your answer more useful. - Erik
[+19] [2010-03-12 06:08:06] Erik

Answer that nearly copies an upvoted answer, with a few clarifying comments, in hopes of getting some cheap upvotes.

(14) upvote based on desire to bury other answers rather than value of this answer. - D_N
[+14] [2010-03-12 15:52:07] mmyers

Pile-on answer that adds nothing new, posted in the hopes that hanging onto the coattails of what looks like a high-vote question will score some cheap points.

(3) Comment pointing out differences between this and other answers in a favorable way, missing the point entirely. - David Thornley
[+12] [2010-03-13 21:09:32] Smalltown2k

Answer of poor inglish is formed and explanations running in intersection directions of longitude but rainfalls in code perfectwise question answering:

public class Hello {
    public static void Main() {
       System.Console.WriteLine("Hello, World!");}

(5) Brillant is answer for the upvote it must. k thx bye. - scunliffe
[+11] [2010-03-12 05:50:51] Adam Davis

Answers own problem with the same solution already in the question. Dismisses other answers out of hand as "unworkable" and "overly simplistic."

Reiterates ideal solution again while challenging others to prove otherwise with real data, while providing no proof of this perspective.

(3) disgust that no one has voted this obviously correct answer above the currently highest voted answer in the last 5 minutes. inference of low intelligence of readers. pretense that I will be objective when I select the accepted answer. - Adam Davis
(1) admonishment for failing to consider security implications inherent in the presented solution. reminders of the many situations where solution is downright dangerous. - quack quixote
(2) @~quack dismissal of concerns as rare and unlikely - Adam Davis
(1) @pollyanna: vehement objection to dismissal; explicit enumeration of prerequisites for safety: point 1, point 2, ...point n. concluding opinion that OP is a doodie-head and resulting product will corrupt any filesystem it touches. - quack quixote
(2) @~quack subtle implication that your maternal progenitor corrupts any file system she touches without being so blatant as to raise the moderator's ire. - Adam Davis
(5) Flagging for moderation attention because somebody used a word that I consider inappropriate. - perbert
(4) @Pollyanna subtle implication that your maternal progenitor has a width property so large, your window needs two scroll bars - Pëkka
(2) @pekka dismissal of your comment as an obvious jealousy of my might and wisdom. Indication that I don't participate in such reprehensible behavior, but that if I did I would likely point out that the female of your nativity requires a distributed peer-to-peer service to move from location to location. - Adam Davis
(2) @Pollyanna suggestion that if engaged in a mud wrestling fight, the female of my nativity would with utmost certainty be able to wrap the mammary glands of your maternal progenitor around her neck, after which she would be able to force her to the ground with high velocity. Assertion of a high probability that your maternal progenitor would sustain considerable dental damage in the process, requiring medical attention over an extended period of time. Expression of suspicion that your family has no sufficient health insurance to pay for that attention. Expression of gloat about this fact. - Pëkka
(3) @Pollyanna also, assertion that the calculation of your maternal progenitor's Body Mass Index by a health insurance company broke a number of unit tests in said company's in-house software. - Pëkka
(2) @Pekka, @Pollyanna: description of gouging own eyes out while screaming bloody epithets at you both for the mental image of your maternal progenitors mud wrestling. announces plans for self-trepanation in the near future to get rid of said image. invites you both to enjoy your hot dates with Mr./Ms. Right(Hand), gives you the one-fingered salute, and logs off. - quack quixote
(1) Leaving a comment explaining why I just downvoted this answer which usually contains a mixture of SQL Injections, poor performance/scaling, incompatibilities to many clients or causes the system to become self aware and killing Unicorns. Editing this comment in response to a later comment that points out there are no Unicorns to clarify that the non-existence of Unicorns just proves my point about the self-aware system. - Michael Stum
@Michael sarcastic comment about how there are no unicorns, and pointed remarks about how short examples aren't meant to contain extensive code to protect against attacks, nor optimize for performance. expression of general agreement that it would be good if the answer mentioned such issues generally, but that the reader is expected to understand them prior to applying this solution. - Adam Davis
(3) @Pollyanna: +1 for killing unicorns. perhaps this solution is worthy after all. - quack quixote
[+11] [2010-03-12 14:27:16] Michael Kristofik

Late arriving answer seemingly ignored by everyone.

(5) perfunctory comment indicating that OP read this answer, but doesn't feel it's otherwise worth responding to. - Adam Davis
(4) Ignoring answer even though the presented solution is just perfect, but buried in the middle of more "loud" answers and because I kinda gave up on this question due to the comparison of several peoples' mothers to Multithreaded-COM Servers that communicate using CORBA. - Michael Stum
[+10] [2010-03-12 20:22:34] Sinan Ünür

An obligatory non-answer answer that was only posted so that maybe some random passerby will understand why I cannot earn any meta rep and vote this answer up.


after reading the well reasoned arguments you outlined in comments.

(2) +1 for smiley. feigned concern for problems described in answer. - Adam Davis
(18) -1 for racist smileys. - mmyers
(2) Expression of weariness of interpretation of racist motives into totally innocent symbols. - Pëkka
(3) @Sinan: You're not playing this very well... ;) - mmyers
(11) Complaint that people can delete comments and leave later comments looking foolish. - mmyers
(5) @mmyers Who? Me? What? When? Where? Really? and further attempts at trying to hide embarrassment at being caught red handed after misunderstanding earlier comment. - Sinan Ünür
[+9] [2010-03-12 13:51:21] ЯegDwight

A thinly veiled lmgtfy link [1] that gets the OP to memorable quotes from Pulp Fiction.


(5) exasperation at google link indicating that I already googled and that if google had the answer I wouldn't have bothered with the yahoos on SO. - Adam Davis
(5) Smug, self-righteous comment expressing disapproval with your obviously manipulative and remorseless attempt to subvert the system that blocks LMGTFY links. - Robert Harvey
(2) @Robert sonorous complaint about censoring out links. - perbert
@voyager link to faq - if you don't like the site's rules, maybe this site isn't for you. - Adam Davis
(2) @Pollyanna: rant about how unsupportive the community is, about how we are loosing valuable contributors by not allowing us to use signatures, how you are all deletionists and censors, and storm out of the thread saying I will never come back again. - perbert
(1) Goes to meta to post question stating that they'll never ever use SO again because of the Nazi community. - perbert
(5) Keeps on using SO after realizing that the alternative is changing my sex expertly. - perbert
Comment about dislike of lmgtfy answers. Gets snarky at end. - David Thornley
Comment about how SO's filters don't catch lmgtfy pages behind tinyURL links. - Pëkka
(3) Comment shorter than 15 chars. - perbert
(2) Meta user with <101 rep creates a question tagged bug about short comments. - perbert
[+9] [2010-03-12 17:41:20] Robert Cartaino

Gratuitous reply to fulfill need for camaraderie. Inserting random humor with only tangential relevance to the original question.

Feigning humor failing. Must insert superfluous comic:

alt text

(3) threat to flag for moderator due to lack of attribution and hotlinking while implying spammyness of answer. - Adam Davis
(2) @Pollyanna - Snarky reply to irritate detractors without addressing any of the issues raised. - Robert Cartaino
(1) @Robert livid with anger, invokes godwin's law - Adam Davis
(3) @Pollyanna: Only a comment nazi would invoke Godwin's Law. - mmyers
(1) Interjection about not really getting the comic strip. - Pëkka
(3) Self-important assertion that four-letter webcomics have lately jumped the shark. - Jimmy
(4) Link to four letter comic with main subject of comic being a jumping shark. - Adam Davis
Request for someone to please explain the comic strip. - Pëkka
(2) @pekka explanation of comic strip with insinuation that programmers of a certain quality would certainly understand it without explanation. link to four letter comic that describes how dissecting a joke kills it. - Adam Davis
(1) Random link in long chain of comments without any explanation of context: - Robert Cartaino
(3) @Pollyanna Retort that if that was the punch line, it really wasn't that great a joke. Claim to have realized that obvious part instantly, but to have been looking for a more original, deeper meaning behind it. - Pëkka
[+8] [2010-03-12 17:39:54] Ether

Vague gratitude expressed to the OP because I have the same problem. Except on a different system, with different commands involved. But perhaps you can solve my problem too?

expression of kinship with Ether for having a similar issue, and suggestion that while OP's own problem remains unsolved perhaps Ether should open a new question to draw more attention to both related problems. expression of warm regards. - Adam Davis
(6) Explanation of the SO Q&A system vis-à-vis a traditional forum, ending with a suggestion to learn how to read the FAQ. Apology for possibly sounding rude. - mmyers
+1 Figuratively flagging non-answer answer as spam while literally voting it up! - Sinan Ünür
(1) -1, suggestion that this comment-posted-as-answer be posted as a comment. - quack quixote
[+7] [2010-03-13 20:45:02] Michael Petrotta

Snarky non-answer that should have been a comment.

(7) snarky offhand comment that I will delete in a couple months to avoid looking like an asshole. - Robert S Ciaccio
[+6] [2010-03-12 15:55:51] jmfsg

Answer that addresses only the title and ignore the content of the post, poster didn't even read the other answers.

(Example: Try jQuery)

upvote because I like solution presented for normal problems with explanation of my failed attempt to use this solution and how it failed already, bringing me to come to SO. - Adam Davis
Argument about how another totally different generic solution to wrong problem is better. Reason 1. Reason 2. Declaration that Downvoter is an idito. - David Thornley
Snarky comment about @David's inability to spell idiot correctly. Bold statement questioning the validity of his entire comment based on that blatant exposition of illiteracy. - Pëkka
(2) Objection to putting 'idiot' in <code> tags, suggesting this is an attack on front-end developers. - D_N
[+6] [2010-03-12 22:42:35] David Thornley

Answer deliberately close to but not quite correct, designed to get the occasional downvote to be canceled by the occasional sympathy upvote, with the intention of picking up some easy rep.

(12) Your depth of strategy disturbs the balance of my brain juices. - D_N
(1) Technically, some of you guys should be downvoting this. So far, I've got four upvotes and no downvotes. - David Thornley
-1: I see through your ruse ... - IAbstract
There's been only one -1 so far. It's not working. - Andrew Grimm
(2) comment pointing out that i would downvote you but i don't have enough rep yet. - Robert S Ciaccio
[+5] [2010-03-12 13:28:39] jmfsg

Answer that disagrees but doesn't actually provide any evidence as to why the suggestion made but the OP is wrong, trying to get the upvotes from the people that disagree with it but doesn't want to downvote the question to avoid the loss of a reputation point.

  • Invented reason the system works good as it is 1
  • Invented reason the system works good as it is 2

(3) assertion that I am right with links to several questions which don't prove anything but would take too long to read and understand so most people will give up before figuring out I'm BS'ing - Adam Davis
[+5] [2010-03-12 20:44:25] perbert

Quick answer posted just before voting to close the answer.

(1) comment insinuating that you are a hypocrite and likely a Rep whore, and pointing you here for further discussion of your unsavory behavior:… - gnostradamus
(13) belittling your knowledge of so - you can't vote to close answers - Adam Davis
[+5] [2011-06-23 20:49:08] Pops

Late answer indicating that the existing highly upvoted answers, including the accepted answer, are now wrong due to recent patches for the program or a new major release of the language.

Completely correct example showing that it is now trivial to achieve what the OP wants by doing

foo.newlyAvailableFeature("and/or", >syntax<);

Edit added the next day wondering why the asker hasn't changed the accepted checkmark to this answer and why nobody is upvoting.

Edit 2 added a few days later griping about how terrible it is that the community doesn't care about old questions.

(1) Comment that I flagged post with alert to moderator ("this question is no longer relevant and doesn't need new responses") to have moderator lock question - Daniel DiPaolo
Smug note that even the language authors validated the OP's concern by addressing it specifically within the language. Flippant response indicating that OP has long since moved on from this now trivial issue, and rather than update it with a new correct answer OP feels it's more constructive to let the question live in stasis as-is, for the benefit of future generations. - Adam Davis
[+4] [2010-03-13 18:34:46] David Thornley

Edit which completely changes the meaning, wording, and essence of the post due to its prior poor grammar and spelling.

(1) expression of hope that you don't mind changes. suggestion to revert them if new edit is unsatisfactory with thinly veiled pride that you won't consider it due to my stellar re-phrasing of your post. - Adam Davis
[+4] [2010-03-14 01:18:11] fretje

Especially badly written, or wrong answer with the sole purpose of gathering 3 downvotes, so I can delete this answer again and harvest myself a nice and shiny [Peer Pressure] badge.

Of course made CW so I won't lose any of those precious internet dollar points in the process.

(3) +1 just to frustrate obvious badge-whoring. flagged for mod attention so the answerer's posting history can be examined for sockpuppetry. - quack quixote
flagged with comment encouraging others to flag so user loses 100 rep for abusive answer. - Adam Davis
(3) Comment telling this anwer will be deleted and thanking the folks for the even more shiny [Disciplined] badge. - fretje
[+4] [2010-07-16 17:46:19] Bob

Extremely late answer that ignores everything already written and makes a duplicate joke because the question's so popular

Also hoping for a [Necromancer] badge...

[+4] [2010-10-27 11:37:54] Piskvor

Hello sir, thanks for the excelent q. Having same prob here, plz can ne1 help? Mail me teh codez to Thank you and God bless

(2) abrupt comment questioning whether this is an answer to the question. - Robert S Ciaccio
(1) @calavera soothing comment reminding that this is the only way for new low-rep members to add input to a question. Musing that it has been discussed on Meta several times, and that maybe it is time to start another feature request regarding this. - Pëkka
(2) comment by newbie pointing out that this is not the way of using this site and that you should open a new question. - Andrea Spadaccini
[+4] [2011-02-17 15:36:19] jmfsg

Answer that steals the previous answer idea, hoping to be slightly better in order to steal the auto-award of the bounty (or failing that, then at least some extra upvotes from the attention the bounty draws).

[+4] [2011-06-23 13:25:01] Al E.
(8) flags as spam, then searches through user history to find other posts to flag as spam - mmyers
[+3] [2010-03-13 15:06:23] splattne

Six to eight weeks.

(4) flippant agreement with specific assessment but encouragement to expand on answer with specific methods used to reach this approximation. - Adam Davis
(6) @Pollyanna: specific methods used to reach that approximation will take six to eight weeks to enumerate. - quack quixote
[+3] [2010-03-25 00:49:24] Aarobot

Unexplainably late reply with poor spelind and grammer by low-rep user that includes a suspicious spammy-looking but still ambiguous link [1] to something that might actually solve the problem, if only the web page didn't make your eyes bleed and head explode from looking at it because the background is yellow and the site uses frames and looks like it might be a direct word-for-word translation from the original Chinese.

Unnecessary closing greeting,
Vaguely foreign-sounding first name


(2) flag offensive due to lack of eyebleach for website. - Adam Davis
[+3] [2010-05-12 09:01:28] fretje

Answer which does nothing more than repeat what has already been said, but posted 60 days after the question has been asked in the hopes it'll harvest one of those coveted [necromancer] badges.

(2) Applause for agreeing with my answer instead of accepted answer. Expression of camaraderie and interest in exchanging contact information - snicker
[+3] [2010-09-24 17:09:20] ErikE

This question reminds me of the age old conundrum:

Q: What is the velocity of butter?

Through much study and searching through dangerous jungles and encountering deadly beasts, I have finally found the most exquisite answer. In my generosity I will share this pearl of wisdom with you:

A: Greased lightning.

This is clearly superior to my previous best answer, which many people would be tempted to use, but further wisdom shows to be inadequate:

A (old): The velocity of butter is in a direct inverse proportion relating indistinctly to the mass of the moon.

[+3] [2011-01-08 22:16:17] Robert S Ciaccio

Answer posted by OP, explaining that he would accept an answer but is unable to because the question was migrated from another site to this one before he had an account here.

Comment asking whether it's that damn difficult to create an associated account here. Request to please stop spamming the question with a new account. - Pëkka
[+2] [2010-05-12 00:26:18] UncleZeiv

Useless reply to a random answer as if this was phpBB.

[+2] [2010-05-12 09:18:27] Gnoupi

Answer added months later describing joyfully a marvelous, wonderful, amazing library which will solve all your problems if you use it, and also sort all your files, search through your mail, and shoot rainbows all over your life.

(6) Comment about all the dead rainbows piling up around here with neat holes through them. - David Thornley
[+2] [2011-02-17 15:28:24] mmyers

Answer which doesn't solve the problem, added in hopes of an auto-award of the bounty (or failing that, then at least some extra upvotes from the attention the bounty draws).

But being CW you won't get any points from upvotes.. :/ - Shadow Wizard
@Sadow Wizrd: Badly spelled rant about the poorly-desgned comunity wiki feature. - mmyers
(1) Comment making fun of the first comment for being a combo breaker - jmfsg
[+1] [2010-03-24 23:30:26] IAbstract

Pre-edit #1: Ramble about figuring out at a much later date how relevant this topic is: how to hash... [1]. And then the importance of discussing this topic: How do I answer... [2].

A crappy answer that has nothing to do with the question - but who cares because it's at the bottom of the list.

EDIT: Attempt to explain how the question was misunderstood and overly apologetic - and go into great detail how rude the biting comments are while explaining that we are all human and tend to make mistakes - except for the OP, of course.

EDIT2: Blame my misunderstanding on @David Thornley's awful editing of the question. Explain how my answer would have been correct if someone had left the question alone...I think - maybe...


Biting commentary about proposed topic. - Adam Davis
[+1] [2010-05-12 00:16:23] nevster

Another answer posted after the topic has run out of steam which has no hopes of getting any upvotes.

(8) I would upvote it, but I can't for two reasons, one of them obvious - jmfsg
(1) Downvoted without comment on the reasons for doing so. - jamiei
[+1] [2010-05-12 02:08:10] Gnome

Is anyone still working on this problem after two months? If you find the answer, please send teh codez to me at gnome@gnomemail.test.

[+1] [2010-05-12 09:20:51] Gnoupi

Answer added a few minutes after this one [1] from a new user, agreeing on everything with the former, and claiming that this library really solved everything and more, and how grateful they are that this was created.


(2) Suggestion that answerer read FAQ. Flagged as spam - snicker
(2) Why was this flagged as spam? It is a legitimate product that solves the OP's problem... and it worked for me! -user1290424 - Pops
(2) @user1290424: Accusation of sock puppetry! Also, general cluelessness. - Piskvor
[+1] [2012-02-16 16:54:23] TCPMAN.EXE

Extremely late answer which adds absolutely no value aside from serving to indicate a certain bullheaded ignorance of the system's suggestion to not post a new answer by its author.

[+1] [2012-03-08 15:51:48] Niklas

The answer that tells you that you've read far too many posts already, and that you start to get tired of the whole thread. And as you start reading the second sentence you've already forgotten what the question was about. This is when you're mind decides that there are other important things to think about, like what your voice inside your head sounds like. So you start to listen to the words that are read to you, by yourself. Why does it feel like I hear the words in my head when I'm only thinking them? Are these my own thoughts or am I reading what the poster wants me to read, to myself, in my own head. I wonder what's new in the Questions' section...

[0] [2010-05-12 04:55:31] Kobi

The question relies on a wrong concept, you really shouldn't do it that way.
Now, I can't give any sample code and couldn't use the tools I recommend if my life dependent on it, but here's a link to a popular post [1], in hope my bald head reflects some of its shine.


[0] [2010-10-27 11:26:21] Macha

Comment about user's own non functioning code, mixing half learned languages and concepts together with syntax errors

public class I'mOO' {
    pulic static null main(String[] args) {
        System.Console.println("This is what you want, right?");

Statement saying that this fixed own problem, OP's totally forgotten at this point.

Speling errors mixd with allegation that users wh can not complile this code are incompetent.