A nicely worded, but pretty useless answer, which mainly gets its upvotes due to extensive use of Markdown ^[1] formatting and by linking a lot of stuff, both related and unrelated ^[2] to the problem in question.

Useless title to draw more attention

A lot of basic information about the questioner's problem. Mostly, it repeats what everyone who is familiar with the tags of the question already knows, but in more exuberant manner, providing the basic information at least twice. It also contains scarce code inclusions to look programming-related. The post also contains a few formatting tricks, including:

• Unnumbered lists ^[3], with item captions in bold. Items of such list should contain a lot of text, so those who reads the question will be sure, that the user is an expert in his area, and has analyzed a lot of alternatives.
• Numbered lists, which, of course, may be omitted ^[4], since users do not like numbers
• Links, both related and unrelated. At least one link to the blog of the user.
• A piece of code in the language requested by OP, the piece being originally written in other language by a lowly voted answer.

The post has at least two sections to justify the use of big font, which is used just to make the post look bigger.

Another useless title

In the second section of such a post code snippets are posted. The algorithm was not originally written by the author. But he rewrote it in C#, and since most users know C#, it would be easier for them to upvote a post that contains the language they are familiar with.

public class Hello
{
   public static void Main()
   {
      System.Console.WriteLine("Hello, World!");
   }
}

Of course, this code, having been written quickly while the post is still under attention, contains a number of issues that were thankfully discussed on SO before. The users links the other stackoverflow question ^[5], and one more ^[6], just in case, so that others upvote him for his effort.

And of course, a hesitating expression of hope that this post helps, knowing that what it helps is only his own reputation counter.

I have same problem any update?

Answer that points out that your Architecture is obviously wrong and questioning why on earth you are still using this stupid technology when your problem could be solved by one line of jQuery code.

$.butterfly({
    aLongList: ofParameters,
    whichAre: notExplained
});

Quick yet canned answer developed in my mind from reading the tags and 2 words of the title of your post.

Edit:

More offtopic and irrelevant vague things in response to @Pollyanna's comment

Yes.

Answer Posted After An Answer is Already Accepted With Superfluous Formatting

Introductory statement about familiarity with the problem. Short background on experience in the field of study related to the question.

Anecdotal short story about how post was just noticed today because generic personal life event has prevented poster from participating in discussions! Statement of confidence that others can relate.

Section about how if extenuating circumstances had not interfered, I would have posted almost the exact same answer. Short response stating that the accepted answer ^[1] is extremely valuable. Multiple praises of accepted answer. Transition to enumerated list of reasons why accepted answer is great:

• Praise of accepted answer's formatting clearly being emulated in this answer
• Acknowledgment of skills and knowledge of the author of accepted answer
• Statement about brevity and conciseness

Long winded response about what accepted answer would look like if extenuating circumstances had not interfered. Subtle yet sharp jabs at author of accepted answer inferring that my answer would have been better

EDIT:

Pre-emptive edit in response to expected comments regarding freehand circles, waffles, or ponies

• Additional link future readers of question may find valuable that accepted answer did not contain ^[2]

Dismissive reply by megapoint user.

Statement of annoyance about having to explain himself by way of this update. Introduction to some ASCII art that elucidates nothing about the problem but does reveal why you ought to upvote him.

-----------------------------------
|                ___      _______/|
|           ____/   \    /        |
|          /         \  /         |
|         /           \/          |
|        /              *         |
|   /\  /                         |
|  /  \/                          |
| /    *                          |
|/                                |
-----------------------------------
my knowledge
* note that downturns and plateaus were result of listening to other people

-----------------------------------
|                                 |
|                                 |
|                                 |
|                                 |
|                                 |
|                                 |
|  _______________________________|
| / *                             |
|/                                |
-----------------------------------
your knowledge 
* note that uptick is from one of my previous answers

Answer that nearly copies an upvoted answer, with a few clarifying comments, in hopes of getting some cheap upvotes.

Pile-on answer that adds nothing new, posted in the hopes that hanging onto the coattails of what looks like a high-vote question will score some cheap points.

Answer of poor inglish is formed and explanations running in intersection directions of longitude but rainfalls in code perfectwise question answering:

public class Hello {
    public static void Main() {
       System.Console.WriteLine("Hello, World!");}
}

Answers own problem with the same solution already in the question. Dismisses other answers out of hand as "unworkable" and "overly simplistic."

Reiterates ideal solution again while challenging others to prove otherwise with real data, while providing no proof of this perspective.

Late arriving answer seemingly ignored by everyone.

☹

An obligatory non-answer answer that was only posted so that maybe some random passerby will understand why I cannot earn any meta rep and vote this answer up.

Update:

☻

after reading the well reasoned arguments you outlined in comments.

A thinly veiled lmgtfy link ^[1] that gets the OP to memorable quotes from Pulp Fiction.

Gratuitous reply to fulfill need for camaraderie. Inserting random humor with only tangential relevance to the original question.

Feigning humor failing. Must insert superfluous comic:

Vague gratitude expressed to the OP because I have the same problem. Except on a different system, with different commands involved. But perhaps you can solve my problem too?

Snarky non-answer that should have been a comment.

Answer that addresses only the title and ignore the content of the post, poster didn't even read the other answers.

(Example: Try jQuery)

Answer deliberately close to but not quite correct, designed to get the occasional downvote to be canceled by the occasional sympathy upvote, with the intention of picking up some easy rep.

Answer that disagrees but doesn't actually provide any evidence as to why the suggestion made but the OP is wrong, trying to get the upvotes from the people that disagree with it but doesn't want to downvote the question to avoid the loss of a reputation point.

• Invented reason the system works good as it is 1
• Invented reason the system works good as it is 2

Quick answer posted just before voting to close the answer.

Late answer indicating that the existing highly upvoted answers, including the accepted answer, are now wrong due to recent patches for the program or a new major release of the language.

Completely correct example showing that it is now trivial to achieve what the OP wants by doing

foo.newlyAvailableFeature("and/or", >syntax<);

Edit added the next day wondering why the asker hasn't changed the accepted checkmark to this answer and why nobody is upvoting.

Edit 2 added a few days later griping about how terrible it is that the community doesn't care about old questions.

Edit which completely changes the meaning, wording, and essence of the post due to its prior poor grammar and spelling.

Especially badly written, or wrong answer with the sole purpose of gathering 3 downvotes, so I can delete this answer again and harvest myself a nice and shiny [Peer Pressure] badge.

_{Of course made CW so I won't lose any of those precious internet dollar points in the process.}

Extremely late answer that ignores everything already written and makes a duplicate joke because the question's so popular

Also hoping for a [Necromancer] badge...

Hello sir, thanks for the excelent q. Having same prob here, plz can ne1 help? Mail me teh codez to mail@example.com Thank you and God bless

Answer that steals the previous answer idea, hoping to be slightly better in order to steal the auto-award of the bounty (or failing that, then at least some extra upvotes from the attention the bounty draws).

http://www.unexplained-link.com/with-no-other-context

Six to eight weeks.

Unexplainably late reply with poor spelind and grammer by low-rep user that includes a suspicious spammy-looking but still ambiguous link ^[1] to something that might actually solve the problem, if only the web page didn't make your eyes bleed and head explode from looking at it because the background is yellow and the site uses frames and looks like it might be a direct word-for-word translation from the original Chinese.

Unnecessary closing greeting,
Vaguely foreign-sounding first name

Answer which does nothing more than repeat what has already been said, but posted 60 days after the question has been asked in the hopes it'll harvest one of those coveted [necromancer] badges.

This question reminds me of the age old conundrum:

Q: What is the velocity of butter?

Through much study and searching through dangerous jungles and encountering deadly beasts, I have finally found the most exquisite answer. In my generosity I will share this pearl of wisdom with you:

A: Greased lightning.

This is clearly superior to my previous best answer, which many people would be tempted to use, but further wisdom shows to be inadequate:

A (old): The velocity of butter is in a direct inverse proportion relating indistinctly to the mass of the moon.

Answer posted by OP, explaining that he would accept an answer but is unable to because the question was migrated from another site to this one before he had an account here.

Useless reply to a random answer as if this was phpBB.

Answer added months later describing joyfully a marvelous, wonderful, amazing library which will solve all your problems if you use it, and also sort all your files, search through your mail, and shoot rainbows all over your life.

Answer which doesn't solve the problem, added in hopes of an auto-award of the bounty (or failing that, then at least some extra upvotes from the attention the bounty draws).

Pre-edit #1: Ramble about figuring out at a much later date how relevant this topic is: how to hash... ^[1]. And then the importance of discussing this topic: How do I answer... ^[2].

A crappy answer that has nothing to do with the question - but who cares because it's at the bottom of the list.

EDIT: Attempt to explain how the question was misunderstood and overly apologetic - and go into great detail how rude the biting comments are while explaining that we are all human and tend to make mistakes - except for the OP, of course.

EDIT2: Blame my misunderstanding on @David Thornley's awful editing of the question. Explain how my answer would have been correct if someone had left the question alone...I think - maybe...

Another answer posted after the topic has run out of steam which has no hopes of getting any upvotes.

Is anyone still working on this problem after two months? If you find the answer, please send teh codez to me at gnome@gnomemail.test.

Answer added a few minutes after this one ^[1] from a new user, agreeing on everything with the former, and claiming that this library really solved everything and more, and how grateful they are that this was created.

Extremely late answer which adds absolutely no value aside from serving to indicate a certain bullheaded ignorance of the system's suggestion to not post a new answer by its author.

The answer that tells you that you've read far too many posts already, and that you start to get tired of the whole thread. And as you start reading the second sentence you've already forgotten what the question was about. This is when you're mind decides that there are other important things to think about, like what your voice inside your head sounds like. So you start to listen to the words that are read to you, by yourself. Why does it feel like I hear the words in my head when I'm only thinking them? Are these my own thoughts or am I reading what the poster wants me to read, to myself, in my own head. I wonder what's new in the Questions' section...

The question relies on a wrong concept, you really shouldn't do it that way.
Now, I can't give any sample code and couldn't use the tools I recommend if my life dependent on it, but here's a link to a popular post ^[1], in hope my bald head reflects some of its shine.

Comment about user's own non functioning code, mixing half learned languages and concepts together with syntax errors

public class I'mOO' {
    pulic static null main(String[] args) {
        System.Console.println("This is what you want, right?");
    }
}

Statement saying that this fixed own problem, OP's totally forgotten at this point.

Speling errors mixd with allegation that users wh can not complile this code are incompetent.